Where mourners find a sympathetic ear
The new "Place of the Senses" at the New Cemetery also includes a mourners' bench. Since April 2026, the Ökumenische Hospizbewegung Offenbach e.V. has been inviting people to meet and talk there every month. The RUHEPUNKT editorial team spoke to the organizer of the service, Sabine Harer, about this new way of providing bereavement support.
Ms. Harer, how did the idea for your own bereavement bench come about?
Two women who have been working for us as grief counselors since 2025 came up with the idea. They had heard about this service at other cemeteries and wanted to implement it in Offenbach too. As the coordinator of bereavement support, I thought it would be a very good addition to our program - and Ms Schreiber immediately gave us her active support.
Who can take advantage of the offer?
It is aimed at anyone who is interested and registration is not necessary. As it is not so easy to reach people who are affected, we now go where the mourners are: to the cemetery. At a fixed time and in a fixed place. Two people from our team are there on the last Thursday of every month, they have blankets and cushions with them and are also open for a walk. I am curious to see how the response develops.
How can conversations help with the grieving process?
We offer a sympathetic ear, based on the principle: "Feel free to tell us how you are feeling - again and again." Grieving people often find that those around them are overwhelmed by the topic and say things like: "Life goes on" or "It's been so long." But that doesn't help. Some people are able to look ahead again three years after a serious loss, for others it takes much less time or longer. Everything is allowed to be as it is. We show understanding and respect to those affected. It is also good for people who have lost a long-term partner, for example, and feel lonely, to meet someone who will listen to them.
What other forms of bereavement support does the Ecumenical Hospice Movement offer?
Our wide range of services includes one-to-one conversations, a guided self-help group for people grieving after a suicide, meetings at the cemetery, talks and walks to help them cope with grief. A fixed annual group for mourners starts again in September. Every third Sunday of the month from 3 p.m. to 5 p.m., we invite people to the grief café at the Treffpunkt Friedhof e.V. premises. Ideally, our guests also network with each other: some now meet up for their own walking appointments. The focus is not always on grief, and of course there is also room for laughter.
Do you find enough people who support your voluntary work in bereavement support?
Fortunately, quite a lot of people who used to use our services themselves later train to provide bereavement support. We actively encourage most of them to switch to the other side, because it takes courage and self-confidence. In return, people also receive a lot of gratitude. One man from our current training group was looking for a meaningful job as a pensioner. He is now offering his own mourners' bench at the cemetery in Bieber on the third Thursday of every month from June 2026. In this way, we can open up more and more opportunities for conversation.
Two grief counselors from the hospice association can be found at the grief bench every last Thursday of the month from 5 pm. Registration is not necessary. Further information is available by calling (069) 800 87 998 and on the hospice association's website